Liquor Store Zen

That about says it all.

Blood, Sweat, and Tears

The past week now I've been working with my wife's father on a landscape lighting project at a mega-rich person's house in the DC area. Rich as in huge house, gorgeous yard, two german sports cars, multiple custom motorcycles and all the trappings. I've learned a few things from the experience of installing landscape lighting that are worth noting.

First, manual labor in 90 degree plus weather sucks. I'm proud to admit I'm an air conditioning afficionado and it's only with a great deal of difficulty that I've learned how the other half works. The first day of the project, I thought I was actually beginning the process of dying just as we knocked off for the day. The second day, I learned that losing some weight might not be a bad idea for more than just my health. Dropping some weight might help me reduce the surface area of my body available to the nearly infinite number of mosquitos hovering around me in the chokingly thick air.

On day three, I learned that wearing shorts without mosquito repellant on day two was a really, REALLY bad idea. My legs look like I absorbed several shotgun blasts at medium range, and the itching is unbearable. I also learned that chiggers are not your friends. OFF brand 'Active' spray is effectively the defensive hand of God.

Day four taught me to drink ice water directly from the dirty spout of an unwashed cooler without flinching, as well as to appreciate an unexpected gift of gatorade as if it were liquid life.

Time to go rest up for day five.

technorati tags: landscaping / lighting / labor / work / mosquito

The Lazarus Effect

It appears that I've inherited the Jesus Touch. Something I can't explain tempted me to attempt to boot my iBook one last time before dismantling it to salvage the hard drive; imagine the shock as the familiar Mac 'bonggggg' chime sounded and the Apple screen fired up.

I don't know how or why it somehow now works. All I know is that it does and the joy-filled stream of obscenities I stammered upon its resurrection attest to my near orgasmic pleasure.

Aside from some milk-stuck keys, everything appears to work normally as of right now. I have to admit some degree of paranoia about turning it off again however. I guess I'm going to have to sooner or later though.

At least I'm safe from Windows for a little while longer.

technorati tags: apple ibook

Boo Berry Claims A Victim

I've managed to go and do the impossible. I've destroyed my iBook. After working outside in the sweltering heat Thursday, I came home to a warm dinner and the promise of some uninterrupted surfing. The kids were in bed, the wife was placated, and I decided to sit down at the computer with a nice bowl of sugar-filled boo-berry cereal.

As I lifted the spoon to scoop up the last few pieces; I somehow managed to lose control over my spoon-hand motor functions and proceeded in a neanderthal like fashion to backhand my bowl, splashing a torrent of blue-flecked milk across the keyboard.

Moojuice infiltrated the innards of my computer within seconds. I unplugged it immediately and turned it off, flipping it upside down in a vain attempt to drain the white destruction. Moments later, after taking out the battery, I was greeted with...milk. In the battery compartment.

I prayed to three separate gods, and even invented a new one just to pray to before attemtping to revive my precious laptop. Tapping the on button resulted in nothing more than the whirring of a very pissed-off sounding fan. No hot monitor action. No operating system love. Nada.

The iBook is dead. Long live the iBook.

Rest in peace.

technorati tags: apple ibook laptop computer destruction mac

Snakes in a Motherf*cking Theater

This has got to be one of the dumbest, most dangerous, and thoughtless pranks ever pulled on hapless moviegoers. Now that I've said that, these were people who paid their hard-earned money to watch a movie about snakes - on a plane, making this prank, though ill-advised, pretty damn funny.

Two live diamondback rattlesnakes were released in an Arizona movie theater during a showing of the new film "Snakes on a Plane," according to Local 6 News.

"That to me is very scary," herpetological association representative Tom Whiting said. "I would hate to be watching a movie about snakes and have a rattlesnake bite me."

No shit. I'll take that and raise him one. I'd hate to be doing anything and have a rattlesnake bite me.

local6.com - Local News - Live Rattlesnakes Released In 'Snakes On A Plane' Theater

technorati tags: snakes / rattlesnakes / snakes+on+a+plane / movie / prank

Shall We Dance?

Let the games begin.

This year, August 22 marks the holy day on the Islamic calendar that is the
day of reckoning for Shiites. Some Shiite sects believe that August 22 could
correspond to the end of the world. And just today, after much hype, Iran
has announced that it will continue to develop its nuclear program.

"The only thing we can know is that the date was not chosen by accident," said Robert Spencer, Director of Jihadwatch.org and an adjunct fellow at the Free Congress Foundation, a conservative think tank. "It does seem very likely, very probable, that he has something major in mind, whether only a major announcement or a major attack, we will soon see."

technorati tags: Iran Islam doomsday jihad terrorism war middle+east

Religion of Hypocrisy

Iran's supreme leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, in a message to Hezbollah head Sheik Hassan Nasrallah, described the militant group's clashes with Israel as a "victory" for Islam.

"Your unprecedented holy war and steadfastness are beyond the limits of my description. It's a divine victory. It is a victory of Islam," Khamenei said in the message read by an announcer on Hezbollah's Al-Manar television.

With God's help you were able to prove that military superiority is not(measured) in the number (of soldiers), planes, warships and tanks.Rather, it depends on the power of faith and holy war," Khamenei said.

Hold on just a second.  Wasn't it just a few days ago I mentioned the Executive Director of CAIR condemning a religious war AGAINST Islam? Hmm.   It appears they're justified in fighting in the name of Allah, but we can't fight back.  Ok, that makes sense.

My Way News - Iran Leader Praises Hezbollah Resistance

technorati tags:Islam, Muslim, CAIR, war, middle+east, terrorism, Allah, Ayatollah+Khameini, Iran, Jihad

Saudi Civil Rights

If Saudi Arabia keeps making progress like this, they'll join the 21st century...in about 600 years.

A court here ruled in favor of a Saudi woman seeking to marry a non-Saudi, causing the forty-something woman to emit thrilling cries of bliss that echoed through the chamber, the daily Al-Madinah reported yesterday.... In Saudi Arabia it can be very difficult for Saudi women to marry non-Saudis..."

Saudi Woman Ecstatic Over Permission to ‘Marry Out’

technorati tags:Saudi+Arabia, middle+east, civil+rights, sexism

I've Got Your Big One Right Here

I can't take a week off without terrorists pulling another shenanigan. Due to some screw-ups, my cable internet has been out for a while now, and I come back to this mess.

The plot had been in the works for months, and its goal was horrific. One after another, planes would have exploded in the sky, sending hundreds of men, women and children to their deaths.

Counterterrorism officials said Thursday the plan thwarted in London appears to bear the fingerprints of al-Qaida, and may even have been “the Big One” they have been dreading since Sept. 11, 2001, particularly as the five-year anniversary of the attacks on the United States approaches.

Nobody has gone on the record declaring the liquid-bomb plot to be the work of Al-Qaeda yet, but it has their stench all over it.

As if the near-miss of a potential attack greater in scope than even 9/11 isn't enough, Muslim groups (read as: CAIR) are now 'afraid of a backlash' against Muslims in the wake of the plot.

U.S. Muslim groups criticized President Bush Thursday for calling a foiled plot to blow up airplanes part of a “war with Islamic fascists,” saying the term could inflame anti-Muslim tensions.

Let's play this game for a moment, starting with the definition of fascism:

1. often Fascism
   1. A system of government marked by centralization of authority under a dictator, stringent socioeconomic controls, suppression of theopposition through terror and censorship, and typically a policy ofbelligerent nationalism and racism.
      
      
   2. A political philosophy or movement based on or advocating such a system of government.
      
      
2. Oppressive, dictatorial control.
   

So far, I see nothing that contradicts the fundamental beliefs of Islamic terrorists. Rather than getting mired down in semantics, let's just accept the fact that the term Islamic Fascism is an appropriate one and move on, shall we?

With CAIR, it's never that easy.

“We ought to take advantage of these incidents to make sure that we do not start a religious war against Islam and Muslims,” he [Nihad Awad, CAIR executive director] told a news conference in Washington.

Wow, that's some good stuff. Let's make sure we don't start a religious war against people who are killing us in the name of Islam. Ok, got it. CAIR is nothing more than a terrorism apologetics organization anyway, so this type of garbage should be expected from them.

Plot may have been 'the Big One' - Airline Terror Plot - MSNBC.com

technorati tags: CAIR islam muslim terrorism terrorist Britain UK+plot Bush

It's Been a While

For my three, possibly four regular readers; I've been out of the loop recently due to some circumstances beyond my control with my internet connection. I should be back within the next day or two at the latest.

Saudi Arabia: Now With Pictures

Another obstacle between the middle east and the west has fallen:

In a step to promote tourism in the Kingdom and allow people to better understand the importance of photography and filming in promoting social and cultural development, Saudi Arabia is now officially allowing photography and filming for all citizens and residents in public areas.

How...staggering.

Kingdom Allows Photography in Public Areas

technorati tags: Saudi+Arabia middle+east photography

Iran's Latest Crude Threat

Lest a day go by without another threat from the peace-loving country of Iran:

Global oil prices could hit $200 per barrel if the United States pursues sanctions against Iran for its nuclear development program, an Iranian official told Venezuelan state TV on Thursday.

Iran's Foreign Relations Vice Minister Manuchehr Mohammadi said, "The first consequence of these sanctions would be an increase in the price of oil to around $200 per barrel."

My Way News

technorati tags:Iran, Oil, war, middle+east, sanctions, UN, US, crude

Bin Laden II: Hezbollah Helper

Saad bin Laden, 27, one of the terror mastermind's eldest sons, was released by the Iranian Revolutionary Guard last Friday, according to the German daily Die Welt.

"From the Lebanese border, he has the task of building Islamist terror cells and preparing them to fight with Hezbollah," the paper said, quoting intelligence sources.

In 2004, Iranian former foreign minister Kamal Kharrazi said the country had jailed about a dozen al Qaeda suspects and would put them on trial. Among them were bin Laden and Saif al-Adel, the terror network's security chief.

OSAMA'S EVIL SPAWN IN LEB By HASANI GITTENS - New York Post Online Edition: News

technorati tags:bin+Laden, Saad, Al+Qaeda, Iran, Revolutionary+Guard, Hezbollah, Lebanon, Israel