The advent of 'web 2.0' and other buzzword driven technologies, as we all know, has enabled a degree of online interaction and news reporting nobody would have thought possible just a few years ago. It's also had an unfortunate side effect, generating an unbelievably selfish sub-society of elite technosnobs.
For example, we find the Linuxheads. The division of computing society whose sole aim is to post on digg and every other tech related website how Windows sucks, Apple sucks, free software is the only way to go and how everyone should just install their particular favorite 'distro' of linux. (Pick one of the 463,819 distros out there...er...463,820 now.) Then proceed to dazzle us (yawn) with stories about how (OMG!!!11!) they managed to install Debian/Gentoo/Fedora/Suckass on an XBox/iPod/Palm/Vibrator or whatever other electronic gizmo they can get their hands on. It's like electronic rape; they're compelled by some unseen force to spread their 'kernel' far and wide to any device with an open port.
Next, we come to the real target of this little rant. The Apple 'fanboy'. Let me state up front that I detest the term 'fanboy.' It's the most overused word on the internet this side of 'AJAX.' This week's Apple product announcement drove the point home to me. Apple rolled out some new products at a smallish media event, and as soon as it was over, the cybershit hit the fan. Everywhere I turned people were bitching ad infinitum about how 'ghey' the event was, and how Apple sucks now because they had us all excited for new iBooks, Mediacenters, Widescreen iPods, or God knows what else. Did they deliver? Oh no, 'just' an Intel Mac mini and the iPod Hi-Fi speaker system.
Fanboys, this is addressed directly to you. Shut the f*ck up. Apple will release the products it wants to when it wants to. Apple does not operate on your schedule unless you are Steve Jobs, and you are not, so stop daydreaming. Apple doesn't suck. You do. Everytime there's the slightest hint of a new apple product, 62 gajillion websites light up like a babboon's ass in heat with every Mac jockey's ideas of what they're going to come out with. It's like a Christmas wishlist. You have no right to get pissed off at Apple for not releasing the product you want when you want it.
I've wanted Microsoft to release a stable version of Windows for years, but that still hasn't happened, and I didn't go off and vent to every Ajax powered news site I could, so get a clue. You're making the rest of us normal Mac users cringe and giving us a bad name by being such hypocritical jackasses. Two minutes before the presentation you were ready to soil your underwear with excitement at the prospect of your preferred product's imminent launch. Two minutes after, and you're telling the world that Apple is betraying its users, exploiting its growing market share by calling un-necessary news conferences, etcetera.
If you're seriously that pissed off, do me a favor. Send me the Mac you're now so ready to abandon. I'll gladly give it a new home. Then go get yourself an HP or Dell and quit bitching. You'll be back, and maybe then you'll know better.
